Busy day, but less busy than usual. I don't know how long it will last, but I hope it lasts as long as God will allow it.
…
One of the most important things we do in our lives as believers is deal with the sin that arises within us. Lately, it seems like I've been carrying around a lot of bad attitudes and trying to make sense of where they've been coming from. It has only rather recently begun to occur to me that God is dealing with the sin in my life that I didn't realize was there.
Before I got saved, my way of dealing with trouble was by burying any bad feelings or attitudes and essentially ignoring them until I couldn't see them anymore. Of course, this has the negative side effect of basically rendering you incapable of feeling anything resembling care or concern, at least for anyone beside yourself. I know from where I speak; I tell people that before I got saved, it wasn't that I didn't care, it was that I couldn't care.
I had an important realization this morning (it seems like I've been having a lot of these lately). I've struggled with fearfulness with a long time; I was more or less ruled by fear. I realized that I was still struggling with that fear, the kind that comes from not trusting God like I should. I had to confess and turn from it, and thank God for His forgiveness
Update-8:33 pm: I was asked to work overtime tonight. I turned it down as there's not much to do, and I feel less inclined to work overtime anyway. Christina, the new helper we just got in the digital room, has just moved out so she can learn to operate the die-cutter. My manager knows, so hopefully we can get the help we need. We've been ahead the past couple of days, but I know it won't stay that way, and I hope we can get the help I know we'll need.
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
Day one-hundred-nineteen
My sister gave me a ride to work today so that she can come in and apply. I'll have to wait until I get home to see how things went. I'll post an update if I find out anything.
Something happened here at work yesterday, after I'd already posted yesterday's entry. Apparently, during lunch, an altercation that very nearly escalated into a fight took place. Of all the reasons for there to be a fight, it was over the use of one of the microwaves in the break room. One of the ladies I work with in the digital room witnessed it, and she said one of the guys involved had to be restrained. They both wound up bing sent home for the day.
It's safe to say that this doesn't make me want to stay here anymore than I already do, nor did it make me want to recommend my sister apply here. Still, it was an isolated incident. Not that it makes me want to stay here longer. Pray that God would grant me patience in seeking new employment. Every day that goes by, I get a little more eager to get out of here.
Update-7:39 pm: I just found out that one of the guys involved in the fight (the presumed instigator) has been fired.
I find myself glad that I didn't see the fight. Considering how I've felt about this job lately, I can't help thinking how tempted I would've been to walk out if I'd seen it. I don't really need any more reasons to want to leave this job.
I would like to say for the record that I didn't really plan to write this much about all that's happened. I had wanted to write a follow-up to my post from a couple of days about trusting God in the face of pessimism, but I'll wait and maybe do that tomorrow.
Update-11:13pm: According to Dad, my sister spent forty-five minutes filling out an application, and set up an appointment for an interview. We'll see what happens, Lord willing.
Something happened here at work yesterday, after I'd already posted yesterday's entry. Apparently, during lunch, an altercation that very nearly escalated into a fight took place. Of all the reasons for there to be a fight, it was over the use of one of the microwaves in the break room. One of the ladies I work with in the digital room witnessed it, and she said one of the guys involved had to be restrained. They both wound up bing sent home for the day.
It's safe to say that this doesn't make me want to stay here anymore than I already do, nor did it make me want to recommend my sister apply here. Still, it was an isolated incident. Not that it makes me want to stay here longer. Pray that God would grant me patience in seeking new employment. Every day that goes by, I get a little more eager to get out of here.
Update-7:39 pm: I just found out that one of the guys involved in the fight (the presumed instigator) has been fired.
I find myself glad that I didn't see the fight. Considering how I've felt about this job lately, I can't help thinking how tempted I would've been to walk out if I'd seen it. I don't really need any more reasons to want to leave this job.
I would like to say for the record that I didn't really plan to write this much about all that's happened. I had wanted to write a follow-up to my post from a couple of days about trusting God in the face of pessimism, but I'll wait and maybe do that tomorrow.
Update-11:13pm: According to Dad, my sister spent forty-five minutes filling out an application, and set up an appointment for an interview. We'll see what happens, Lord willing.
Monday, April 28, 2014
Day one-hundred-eighteen
I'm struggling with a work issue, and I'm not really sure what to do.
My sister is thinking seriously about leaving her job at Target. She asked me to see what she would need to go to get interviewed where I work. I went to Human Resources and that said she just needs to come down and fill out an application. They are actively hiring right now, so if she pursued it, I think it's a safe bet she would get hired.
Of course, that would make someone ask, "So what's the problem?" There as a couple of issues to consider.
First of all, the work is very physically demanding. Packing work is not difficult in itself, but the environment takes a lot out of you. It's very hot, often over 100 degrees, especially in the now-approaching summer months. Also, the is the constant noise of large machinery all day long. It rarely stops, if ever. If my sister interviews, they'll take her out onto the warehouse floor and she'll see what it's like.
Secondly, I feel kind of conflicted about referring someone to a job that I do and don't particularly like. I have already said that I would quit at the first opportunity, I've begun seeing what other jobs are available, and I have people paring for me that God might lead me elsewhere. I like my job sometimes, and sometimes I absolutely hate it. Never have I ever loved it. If and when I leave this place, it's safe to say that I will be with few tears, if any. The best things I can say about it are that it's close to home and it pays the bills. It's not rewarding and it's not anything out of which I'd want to make a career.
I pray that I would be honest with my sister in answering any of her questions, I pray that I would be patient on The Lord as I seek another job, and I pray that. He would draw near to my sister, that she would draw near to Him.
My sister is thinking seriously about leaving her job at Target. She asked me to see what she would need to go to get interviewed where I work. I went to Human Resources and that said she just needs to come down and fill out an application. They are actively hiring right now, so if she pursued it, I think it's a safe bet she would get hired.
Of course, that would make someone ask, "So what's the problem?" There as a couple of issues to consider.
First of all, the work is very physically demanding. Packing work is not difficult in itself, but the environment takes a lot out of you. It's very hot, often over 100 degrees, especially in the now-approaching summer months. Also, the is the constant noise of large machinery all day long. It rarely stops, if ever. If my sister interviews, they'll take her out onto the warehouse floor and she'll see what it's like.
Secondly, I feel kind of conflicted about referring someone to a job that I do and don't particularly like. I have already said that I would quit at the first opportunity, I've begun seeing what other jobs are available, and I have people paring for me that God might lead me elsewhere. I like my job sometimes, and sometimes I absolutely hate it. Never have I ever loved it. If and when I leave this place, it's safe to say that I will be with few tears, if any. The best things I can say about it are that it's close to home and it pays the bills. It's not rewarding and it's not anything out of which I'd want to make a career.
I pray that I would be honest with my sister in answering any of her questions, I pray that I would be patient on The Lord as I seek another job, and I pray that. He would draw near to my sister, that she would draw near to Him.
Sunday, April 27, 2014
Day one-hundred-seventeen
I have a little bit of a headache as I write this. I took a nap and I must've slept with my head in a weird position. I get it in the back of my neck, and it can turn into a tension headache. I hope it doesn't.
In examining my own walk with The Lord, it's easy to get discouraged. It's easy for me to see all the times I didn't trust God, when I did what I shouldn't have done, when I didn't do what I should've done. This perspective seems all the more real, and all the more daunting, when you are a pessimist by nature, like me.
Pessimism makes it all too easy to think ill of things, of others, even of God Himself. It's such an easy temptation when you tend to distrustful by nature. There are moments when I trust God as I know I ought to, and there are moments where it's a struggle to trust Him.
It's those moments, where God turns up the heat as He works on us, that it becomes easy to wonder what He's doing or if He even cares. I realize that He does care about me, and that He is working on me even now. I asked Him to give me a more humble heart, and part of that has been dealing with sin that still exists in my life, much if it latent.
Isaiah wrote that God refines us with the fire of affliction. If anything, this time has make it clear that I have harbored a lot of bad attitudes in my heart that God is driving to the surface. I find I've been spending a good deal of time lately in quiet prayer, simply asking God to take these rotten attitudes from me and to give me a heart of love and purity. Even though it is often painful, I am being purified.
I would guess that the biggest hazard in being a pessimist is that you tend to trust your own assessment of things, and that assessment is typically bleak. It can fail to see the goodness of God at work, because it doesn't look for the good. I pray constantly that I would learn to trust God first and only. I think I've demonstrated that I cannot and should not trust myself.
In examining my own walk with The Lord, it's easy to get discouraged. It's easy for me to see all the times I didn't trust God, when I did what I shouldn't have done, when I didn't do what I should've done. This perspective seems all the more real, and all the more daunting, when you are a pessimist by nature, like me.
Pessimism makes it all too easy to think ill of things, of others, even of God Himself. It's such an easy temptation when you tend to distrustful by nature. There are moments when I trust God as I know I ought to, and there are moments where it's a struggle to trust Him.
It's those moments, where God turns up the heat as He works on us, that it becomes easy to wonder what He's doing or if He even cares. I realize that He does care about me, and that He is working on me even now. I asked Him to give me a more humble heart, and part of that has been dealing with sin that still exists in my life, much if it latent.
Isaiah wrote that God refines us with the fire of affliction. If anything, this time has make it clear that I have harbored a lot of bad attitudes in my heart that God is driving to the surface. I find I've been spending a good deal of time lately in quiet prayer, simply asking God to take these rotten attitudes from me and to give me a heart of love and purity. Even though it is often painful, I am being purified.
I would guess that the biggest hazard in being a pessimist is that you tend to trust your own assessment of things, and that assessment is typically bleak. It can fail to see the goodness of God at work, because it doesn't look for the good. I pray constantly that I would learn to trust God first and only. I think I've demonstrated that I cannot and should not trust myself.
Saturday, April 26, 2014
Day one-hundred-sixteen
Quiet Saturday. It's nice to be home after such a busy week.
After I got home last night, I had an important realization. Lately, it seems like it's been a struggle for me to trust God as I ought to be. I realized that I had been too willing to not trust Him; you could even say too eager to not trust Him.
I've been asking The Lord in prayer to give me a more humble heart. That means dealing with sin, confessing and turning from it, trusting in God's forgiveness and His eagerness to forgive. Jesus Himself illustrates this in the parable of the prodigal son. For me, I've been seeing a lot of rotten attitudes that rise to the surface, seemingly out of nowhere. My dad affirmed this in his own life, when he could see some of the same bad attitudes his father had, after he and Mom first got married.
These sins can seem so wearying since we don't seem to understand why they're even there, though they are the products of our sinful hearts. It's embarrassing and disheartening to see these sins in our own lives. That's why it's so important to take these things to God. He knows they're in our hearts, He shows them to us so that we may confess and turn from them.
If you take away anything from this, it's to trust not only to trust in God's forgiveness, but true in His eagerness to forgive. Lord knows I need to take this to heart as much as anyone else.
After I got home last night, I had an important realization. Lately, it seems like it's been a struggle for me to trust God as I ought to be. I realized that I had been too willing to not trust Him; you could even say too eager to not trust Him.
I've been asking The Lord in prayer to give me a more humble heart. That means dealing with sin, confessing and turning from it, trusting in God's forgiveness and His eagerness to forgive. Jesus Himself illustrates this in the parable of the prodigal son. For me, I've been seeing a lot of rotten attitudes that rise to the surface, seemingly out of nowhere. My dad affirmed this in his own life, when he could see some of the same bad attitudes his father had, after he and Mom first got married.
These sins can seem so wearying since we don't seem to understand why they're even there, though they are the products of our sinful hearts. It's embarrassing and disheartening to see these sins in our own lives. That's why it's so important to take these things to God. He knows they're in our hearts, He shows them to us so that we may confess and turn from them.
If you take away anything from this, it's to trust not only to trust in God's forgiveness, but true in His eagerness to forgive. Lord knows I need to take this to heart as much as anyone else.
Friday, April 25, 2014
Day one-hundred-fifteen
Today has been a blessing, work wise.
For the first time in a few weeks, we're actually caught up to the point that we are already getting ahead on work for Monday. Also, because it's Friday, stuff can be sent out later so that we can get more done. Nothing ships on Saturday, so we have the luxury of getting more done and having more time to do it.
That said, I'm thinking more and more about looking for a different job. The best things about this job are that it pays my bills and it's close to home. I like my work, sometimes, but I don't love it. It has far too many ups and downs to want to hang with it, especially if it's work that's not personally rewarding. It meets the physical needs that I have, and I think God is using the situation to cause me to grow, but I'll readily admit that I would walk away from this place at the first opportunity. I don't want to build my career here, although they'll certainly to make that opportunity happen.
I started looking at Craigslist on my last break, just to start seeing what's out there. At the moment, there's not a lot out there. The most interesting thing I've seen so far is an ad looking for an assistant to a pickup artist. For those who do not know, a pickup artist teaches schlubby dudes who don't know how to pick up women how to do it. The assistant would be teaching guys how to text to women. I'm not saying I'd go for this job, I just marvel at the idea that it exists.
Pray that if it's God's will, I would find another job, something that I would love doing.
For the first time in a few weeks, we're actually caught up to the point that we are already getting ahead on work for Monday. Also, because it's Friday, stuff can be sent out later so that we can get more done. Nothing ships on Saturday, so we have the luxury of getting more done and having more time to do it.
That said, I'm thinking more and more about looking for a different job. The best things about this job are that it pays my bills and it's close to home. I like my work, sometimes, but I don't love it. It has far too many ups and downs to want to hang with it, especially if it's work that's not personally rewarding. It meets the physical needs that I have, and I think God is using the situation to cause me to grow, but I'll readily admit that I would walk away from this place at the first opportunity. I don't want to build my career here, although they'll certainly to make that opportunity happen.
I started looking at Craigslist on my last break, just to start seeing what's out there. At the moment, there's not a lot out there. The most interesting thing I've seen so far is an ad looking for an assistant to a pickup artist. For those who do not know, a pickup artist teaches schlubby dudes who don't know how to pick up women how to do it. The assistant would be teaching guys how to text to women. I'm not saying I'd go for this job, I just marvel at the idea that it exists.
Pray that if it's God's will, I would find another job, something that I would love doing.
Thursday, April 24, 2014
Day one-hundred-fourteen
Today's been one of those days that's been really up and down.
Things have been in such disarray in the digital room that they had to change or it was going to become completely unworkable. Today made a big difference, though.
First, I realized that God may have been keeping me from speaking up too soon, that is, before I had all the facts. I had a long talk with Marco from the first shift, and it proved to be very enlightening. First, I discovered they really only have two packer/shippers. The third shipper has been filling in for Marco as he's been spending the first half of his shifts training elsewhere, and has had to leave his work to a lady from the warehouse floor who has apparently been doing a poor job. They have been as understaffed and I'll-equipped as we've been, except they don't have the pressure of meeting deadlines.
Secondly, I had the opportunity to talk to Gaby from Human Resources about what's going on. They've been aware that things are busy, but they didn't realize that things were going so badly. Also, my manager, John, is now aware of how poorly things are working out. Both have promised that changes are coming, John himself having gone straight up to corporate. Gaby has said that are plans to continue hiring more people.
Pray that God's hand would be in all this, and that I would trust Him and His faithfulness in what are often deeply discouraging circumstances.
Things have been in such disarray in the digital room that they had to change or it was going to become completely unworkable. Today made a big difference, though.
First, I realized that God may have been keeping me from speaking up too soon, that is, before I had all the facts. I had a long talk with Marco from the first shift, and it proved to be very enlightening. First, I discovered they really only have two packer/shippers. The third shipper has been filling in for Marco as he's been spending the first half of his shifts training elsewhere, and has had to leave his work to a lady from the warehouse floor who has apparently been doing a poor job. They have been as understaffed and I'll-equipped as we've been, except they don't have the pressure of meeting deadlines.
Secondly, I had the opportunity to talk to Gaby from Human Resources about what's going on. They've been aware that things are busy, but they didn't realize that things were going so badly. Also, my manager, John, is now aware of how poorly things are working out. Both have promised that changes are coming, John himself having gone straight up to corporate. Gaby has said that are plans to continue hiring more people.
Pray that God's hand would be in all this, and that I would trust Him and His faithfulness in what are often deeply discouraging circumstances.
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Day one-hundred-thirteen
Another busy day at work. I don't know how long things can hold out. As it exists now, things in the digital room cannot keep going as they are. We are working so much harder than we have to, and all we have to show for it is that we can barely make it to the end of the day.
I've been thinking about what I should say to management. Personally, I think we've put up with an unworkable situation for too long. While we've been told that things will start slowing down for the season, the digital room is busier than ever.
This evening has been a bit of a revelation for me, however. I found that I'm not the only one who's noticed how little the first shift staff manages to get done, nor that it seems to be because they are not responsible for being sure things get shipped on time. I had to leave a hand-written sign telling them to work on roll labels, which they typically ignore. Rather than be discouraged by this discovery, I'm actually a little encouraged. Maybe nobody's too sure what to do, but at least we're all on the same page.
Again, I ask that all you out pray for wisdom for me. Things can't stay as they are, since that's hurting productivity. Maybe that's how I need to say it to management, if or when I say anything. I'm not sure what I should do.
Anyway, it's 11:14 pm and it's time for a late dinner. Cheeseburger and chili cheese fries from Tommy's.
I've been thinking about what I should say to management. Personally, I think we've put up with an unworkable situation for too long. While we've been told that things will start slowing down for the season, the digital room is busier than ever.
This evening has been a bit of a revelation for me, however. I found that I'm not the only one who's noticed how little the first shift staff manages to get done, nor that it seems to be because they are not responsible for being sure things get shipped on time. I had to leave a hand-written sign telling them to work on roll labels, which they typically ignore. Rather than be discouraged by this discovery, I'm actually a little encouraged. Maybe nobody's too sure what to do, but at least we're all on the same page.
Again, I ask that all you out pray for wisdom for me. Things can't stay as they are, since that's hurting productivity. Maybe that's how I need to say it to management, if or when I say anything. I'm not sure what I should do.
Anyway, it's 11:14 pm and it's time for a late dinner. Cheeseburger and chili cheese fries from Tommy's.
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
Day one-hundred-twelve
Today has been an incredibly frustrating day at work. I've had about enough. Something's got to change because things are not working as they exist right now, and if somebody has to be fired, maybe that's for the best.
I need to explain. Truth be told, though, I don't really know where to start.
Maybe, first things first. In particular, the first shift and the people who work it. The cutter literally doesn't care what gets done or how, so stuff gets stacked everywhere with no sense of organization. Of course, this leaves the packers/shippers little else but to completely ignore it and leave it to us, on the second shift. Also, I now know that I'm not the only one who's noticed that the first shift (which is known to be less busy across the board) seems to get very little done, especially since they have three packer/shippers while we have two, on the busier, and thus more needful, second shift. If stuff has to be diecut or drilled for hanging, they'll box it but they won't send it out, so we have to make the time for it. This is doubly unfair for the people on second shift whose job it is to do these things, when they can be done first shift. I think it boils down to this: they don't have to make sure things get done on time, so they don't care. The second shift doesn't have that excuse.
Secondly, the second shift in the digital room is critically understaffed. Occasionally, one the of first shift workers, Marcos, will stay for overtime, sometimes for as much as four hours. There have been days where we would not get everything done on time if he didn't stay. Honestly, we don't need occasional help, we need a third permanent packer, and we've needed one since I got into the digital room two months ago. I have said repeatedly that we need another packer. If the first shift has one, we definitely need one, and we need one now.
Pray for wisdom for me, as I try to figure out what I should do. I know I need to talk to someone, my manager, Human Resources, whoever. What I do know is that I need to trust God in all this, and I need to do the right thing, whatever that may be.
…
Update-8:35 pm: Right after lunch, I had the opportunity to talk with our shift supervisor, Raul. I told him we needed more help in the digital room immediately and permanently. He has always been friendly, patient, and open to what I've had to say. He said he would put someone in with us permanently.
He decided to place a girl named Christina with us. This is a very good choice and a blessing for many reasons. She's friendly, helpful, and takes direction well. Perhaps most importantly, she actually wants to work in digital. To me, just having that attitude makes a world of difference.
Now, if we could only get the first shift to do what they're supposed to be doing, things would be fantastic. I'm not holding my breath.
…
Update #2-10:33 pm: I'm working a hour of overtime tonight; I'm on my last break for the night. We finally got everything done that was due today. Of course, we finished it less than ten minutes ago, which technically makes it late, but no matter.
Now's the rare chance to get ahead on what's due tomorrow. There's a lot due tomorrow, and I'm working on gathering everything that needs to be sent out for diecutting, drilling, etc.
I'm glad this day is almost done. I've written enough about work today.
I need to explain. Truth be told, though, I don't really know where to start.
Maybe, first things first. In particular, the first shift and the people who work it. The cutter literally doesn't care what gets done or how, so stuff gets stacked everywhere with no sense of organization. Of course, this leaves the packers/shippers little else but to completely ignore it and leave it to us, on the second shift. Also, I now know that I'm not the only one who's noticed that the first shift (which is known to be less busy across the board) seems to get very little done, especially since they have three packer/shippers while we have two, on the busier, and thus more needful, second shift. If stuff has to be diecut or drilled for hanging, they'll box it but they won't send it out, so we have to make the time for it. This is doubly unfair for the people on second shift whose job it is to do these things, when they can be done first shift. I think it boils down to this: they don't have to make sure things get done on time, so they don't care. The second shift doesn't have that excuse.
Secondly, the second shift in the digital room is critically understaffed. Occasionally, one the of first shift workers, Marcos, will stay for overtime, sometimes for as much as four hours. There have been days where we would not get everything done on time if he didn't stay. Honestly, we don't need occasional help, we need a third permanent packer, and we've needed one since I got into the digital room two months ago. I have said repeatedly that we need another packer. If the first shift has one, we definitely need one, and we need one now.
Pray for wisdom for me, as I try to figure out what I should do. I know I need to talk to someone, my manager, Human Resources, whoever. What I do know is that I need to trust God in all this, and I need to do the right thing, whatever that may be.
…
Update-8:35 pm: Right after lunch, I had the opportunity to talk with our shift supervisor, Raul. I told him we needed more help in the digital room immediately and permanently. He has always been friendly, patient, and open to what I've had to say. He said he would put someone in with us permanently.
He decided to place a girl named Christina with us. This is a very good choice and a blessing for many reasons. She's friendly, helpful, and takes direction well. Perhaps most importantly, she actually wants to work in digital. To me, just having that attitude makes a world of difference.
Now, if we could only get the first shift to do what they're supposed to be doing, things would be fantastic. I'm not holding my breath.
…
Update #2-10:33 pm: I'm working a hour of overtime tonight; I'm on my last break for the night. We finally got everything done that was due today. Of course, we finished it less than ten minutes ago, which technically makes it late, but no matter.
Now's the rare chance to get ahead on what's due tomorrow. There's a lot due tomorrow, and I'm working on gathering everything that needs to be sent out for diecutting, drilling, etc.
I'm glad this day is almost done. I've written enough about work today.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Day one-hundred-eleven
It is 6:07 pm as I write this. I lost track of the time, and I am actually a few minutes late for lunch. It's been a very busy day at work.
If you're reading this, it's close to midnight, or perhaps even Tuesday already. The wifi at work has been extremely slow for the past week, to the point that I can't even really connect to any servers even though I'm getting a signal. All it means is that I'll be writing this blog in the Notes app on my iPod Touch and uploading them when I get home.
I just pray that we get everything done. I don't really want to stay for overtime tonight, especially since I have to run a quick errand as soon as I get home. There's certainly enough to do; there is a lot of stuff waiting for tomorrow that we should start knocking out if we can.
Man, I get tired of writing about work. It's not very interesting to write about, and I imagine it can't be very interesting to read. I don't even have any more news on the "promotion" front. Things seemed like they were moving in a particular direction, but now, things seem to have stopped. I really don't know what's going to happen. I pray for wisdom and patience in all this.
I find myself thinking more and more about finding another job. The job I have now, I do well and I get along well with my coworkers, but it's not what I would call "rewarding". I don't really enjoy what I do, but I still want to do a good job. Something else in which I could definitely use some prayer for wisdom and patience.
Update-8:33 pm: I just had a first in the time I've been working here. Today marks the first time I've had to get into the first aid kit. I just gave myself a quarter-inch cut on my right thumb with the sharp edge of…a piece of cardboard.
If you're reading this, it's close to midnight, or perhaps even Tuesday already. The wifi at work has been extremely slow for the past week, to the point that I can't even really connect to any servers even though I'm getting a signal. All it means is that I'll be writing this blog in the Notes app on my iPod Touch and uploading them when I get home.
I just pray that we get everything done. I don't really want to stay for overtime tonight, especially since I have to run a quick errand as soon as I get home. There's certainly enough to do; there is a lot of stuff waiting for tomorrow that we should start knocking out if we can.
Man, I get tired of writing about work. It's not very interesting to write about, and I imagine it can't be very interesting to read. I don't even have any more news on the "promotion" front. Things seemed like they were moving in a particular direction, but now, things seem to have stopped. I really don't know what's going to happen. I pray for wisdom and patience in all this.
I find myself thinking more and more about finding another job. The job I have now, I do well and I get along well with my coworkers, but it's not what I would call "rewarding". I don't really enjoy what I do, but I still want to do a good job. Something else in which I could definitely use some prayer for wisdom and patience.
Update-8:33 pm: I just had a first in the time I've been working here. Today marks the first time I've had to get into the first aid kit. I just gave myself a quarter-inch cut on my right thumb with the sharp edge of…a piece of cardboard.
Sunday, April 20, 2014
Day one-hundred-ten
Recently, it has been one of my most fervent prayers that God would make me a more humble person. This has proven to be one of the best, and most painful, things I've ever prayed for.
Why it's good is that God is faithful to answer that prayer. Slowly, I see that He is working in me to cultivate a heart of humility. Philippians 2:3 says, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves." All too often, it's been too easy for me to put myself ahead of others, in so many different ways. I've been too willing to keep myself away from others because it was more convenient. I hadn't been cultivating diligence in my life and my heart, diligence to seek the things God desires for me.
That also points to why the pursuit of humility is so painful. Part of cultivating humility is the confession of sin. Lately, it seems like my attitude has been, for lack of a better word, rotten. My thoughts have seemed bitter and hateful, my heart was stirred with bitterness and nastiness. It seems like I've been all too ready to distrust God in trying circumstances. Sometimes, it seems so intense that I've begun to wonder if I'm even saved at all.
I've been so slow to recognize that this may be how God has chosen to work on me. How slow? I just now realized that. The Scriptures attest that God will allow us to be afflicted, though sources demonic or otherwise. Isaiah 48:10 says, "See, I have refined you, though not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction."
This trying time has brought me to God in fervent prayer. Oftentimes, this prayer has come while battling through severe temptation to turn from God and loud, wrathful thoughts. God has been refining me, turning up the heat to draw out the dross. To be cultivate humility, He must remove that which would hinder humility; namely, distrust, and beyond that, pride.
I still find myself deeply troubled by pride in my walk with The Lord. Pride once permeated everything about me, though I certainly had nothing about which to be proud. I still don't, I just can see that, now. My pride led me to shut others away, and I led a dreary, lonely, empty existence that I once saw as inescapable, and became bitterly resigned to a pointless life. Things are different now, since God has saved me. I have love in my a new heart, a love from the One who first loved me and humbled Himself on my behalf. How could I refuse Him? Nothing's come along that's been better, and every good thing I've gained has come from Him.
If anything I've written has been an encouragement to you, then I hope you are encouraged. Honestly, I think God puts it upon my heart to write about these things because I need to be reminded.
I've been so slow to recognize that this may be how God has chosen to work on me. How slow? I just now realized that. The Scriptures attest that God will allow us to be afflicted, though sources demonic or otherwise. Isaiah 48:10 says, "See, I have refined you, though not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction."
This trying time has brought me to God in fervent prayer. Oftentimes, this prayer has come while battling through severe temptation to turn from God and loud, wrathful thoughts. God has been refining me, turning up the heat to draw out the dross. To be cultivate humility, He must remove that which would hinder humility; namely, distrust, and beyond that, pride.
I still find myself deeply troubled by pride in my walk with The Lord. Pride once permeated everything about me, though I certainly had nothing about which to be proud. I still don't, I just can see that, now. My pride led me to shut others away, and I led a dreary, lonely, empty existence that I once saw as inescapable, and became bitterly resigned to a pointless life. Things are different now, since God has saved me. I have love in my a new heart, a love from the One who first loved me and humbled Himself on my behalf. How could I refuse Him? Nothing's come along that's been better, and every good thing I've gained has come from Him.
If anything I've written has been an encouragement to you, then I hope you are encouraged. Honestly, I think God puts it upon my heart to write about these things because I need to be reminded.
Saturday, April 19, 2014
Day one-hundred-nine
Quiet day today. I've spent the whole day at home but looking forward to church tomorrow.
It looks like we'll be having a barbecue for Easter. We've got to finish cleaning the grill after church tomorrow. It also looks like our cousins will be coming over. We'll be having a big meal for I guess what may be a late lunch/early dinner, as my sister is going out for the evening. I'm just glad my stomach is finally getting back to normal.
One big thing did come up just a little while ago. We had our van worked on and my dad is disputing some of the billing. He thinks some unnecessary work was done and that Mom was talked into thinking it was necessary. Anyway, Dad has now made it clear that he is no longer interested in being a car owner. With his motorized tricycle, he really doesn't need a car to get to either work or church. In any case, he has told Mom that she and my sisters (if they desire to do so) need to make arrangements toward getting their own car. Also, he feels that we spend too much money to keep the van running, which we are, especially of a seventeen-year-old van with little monetary value. He did the math and figured out that he no longer poured any money into keeping the van, he could get out of debt within two years.
Please pray for wisdom in all these things. Pray for Mom and my sisters, that The Lord would grant them wisdom in this very important decision. Pray that He would enable me to figure out what I'm going to do, because this change will impact me inasmuch it would leave me without a reliable ride to church apart from the bus.
One last thing: I found out that my sister Laura will be moving back down from Fresno in about a month, when school wraps up for the year. She's ready to be done there, and with what she wants and needs to do to finish, she can get all that down here.
It looks like we'll be having a barbecue for Easter. We've got to finish cleaning the grill after church tomorrow. It also looks like our cousins will be coming over. We'll be having a big meal for I guess what may be a late lunch/early dinner, as my sister is going out for the evening. I'm just glad my stomach is finally getting back to normal.
One big thing did come up just a little while ago. We had our van worked on and my dad is disputing some of the billing. He thinks some unnecessary work was done and that Mom was talked into thinking it was necessary. Anyway, Dad has now made it clear that he is no longer interested in being a car owner. With his motorized tricycle, he really doesn't need a car to get to either work or church. In any case, he has told Mom that she and my sisters (if they desire to do so) need to make arrangements toward getting their own car. Also, he feels that we spend too much money to keep the van running, which we are, especially of a seventeen-year-old van with little monetary value. He did the math and figured out that he no longer poured any money into keeping the van, he could get out of debt within two years.
Please pray for wisdom in all these things. Pray for Mom and my sisters, that The Lord would grant them wisdom in this very important decision. Pray that He would enable me to figure out what I'm going to do, because this change will impact me inasmuch it would leave me without a reliable ride to church apart from the bus.
One last thing: I found out that my sister Laura will be moving back down from Fresno in about a month, when school wraps up for the year. She's ready to be done there, and with what she wants and needs to do to finish, she can get all that down here.
Friday, April 18, 2014
Day one-hundred-eight
Writing this on my last break of the day. We've got no overtime tonight, which is nice. Apparently, we don't have overtime on Fridays as a rule, but that seems to be a recent development. I seem to recall working overtime on one Friday night fairly early on.
Today is Good Friday, the day we celebrate the death of Jesus Christ on the cross. I realize that to a non-Christian, it must seem very odd to celebrate what is to a certain extant, a very tragic event. For believers, however, it is a celebration because the cross is where my salvation by bought by the death of Jesus. He paid for all our sins so that we may be clothed in His perfect righteousness. Without the death and resurrection, Scripture tells us we have no hope.
Thankfully, we God saves us, He enables us to trust in His faithfulness. As the verse says, no one can snatch us from His hand.
Heading home from work now. May The Lord bless this Easter Sunday.
Today is Good Friday, the day we celebrate the death of Jesus Christ on the cross. I realize that to a non-Christian, it must seem very odd to celebrate what is to a certain extant, a very tragic event. For believers, however, it is a celebration because the cross is where my salvation by bought by the death of Jesus. He paid for all our sins so that we may be clothed in His perfect righteousness. Without the death and resurrection, Scripture tells us we have no hope.
Thankfully, we God saves us, He enables us to trust in His faithfulness. As the verse says, no one can snatch us from His hand.
Heading home from work now. May The Lord bless this Easter Sunday.
Thursday, April 17, 2014
Day one-hundred-seven
It's just going to be a quickie post tonight; it's 11:23 pm as I write this. I didn't realize it was this late already and the wifi at work was slow today.
The workload at the printing company is definitely becoming noticeably slower. I still spent the full day in the digital room, where it was fairly busy but not hectic. That was a nice break, considering how busy we've been lately, doubly so since it's Thursday and that's usually the busiest day of the week.
Still, I feel like I didn't get a lot done today. I feel like I worked slowly and I didn't have much energy. On top of that, I've felt physically weaker. It's most likely because I've have a rather diminished appetite with my stomach problems, but it seems like maybe I'm finally starting to get back to normal.
It seems like whenever I say it's going to be a short post, that's the time when I start to feel productive. If anything, it's another indication of someone I've begun to notice about myself, especially at work: the tendency to speak just a little too soon. For example, if one of the managers comes in and asks if we have any jobs left that are due that day, I'll say "no" because I honestly think there are none left. More often than not, one or two jobs will come up. It makes me realize that I really need to stop and think about how I should properly respond to such things.
It's just that I'm not a very talkative person. The most words I use at any one time on any given day are what I write here. Apart from that, maybe the most speech I use is in prayer. I will engage others, but I don't initiate most conversations. It's simply very easy for me to allow conversation to go by. I do tend to think I'm a better listener, but that isn't even what it could be, or ought to be.
The workload at the printing company is definitely becoming noticeably slower. I still spent the full day in the digital room, where it was fairly busy but not hectic. That was a nice break, considering how busy we've been lately, doubly so since it's Thursday and that's usually the busiest day of the week.
Still, I feel like I didn't get a lot done today. I feel like I worked slowly and I didn't have much energy. On top of that, I've felt physically weaker. It's most likely because I've have a rather diminished appetite with my stomach problems, but it seems like maybe I'm finally starting to get back to normal.
It seems like whenever I say it's going to be a short post, that's the time when I start to feel productive. If anything, it's another indication of someone I've begun to notice about myself, especially at work: the tendency to speak just a little too soon. For example, if one of the managers comes in and asks if we have any jobs left that are due that day, I'll say "no" because I honestly think there are none left. More often than not, one or two jobs will come up. It makes me realize that I really need to stop and think about how I should properly respond to such things.
It's just that I'm not a very talkative person. The most words I use at any one time on any given day are what I write here. Apart from that, maybe the most speech I use is in prayer. I will engage others, but I don't initiate most conversations. It's simply very easy for me to allow conversation to go by. I do tend to think I'm a better listener, but that isn't even what it could be, or ought to be.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Day one-hundred-six
I'm back at work today, still waiting and hoping that the MiraLax will take effect. The back of the packet does say that it could take one to three days to work. I've already used two packets, one today and one yesterday, and I can't take anymore until tomorrow. Pray that this stuff works, otherwise I'll have to get the magnesium citrate. If that doesn't work, nothing will.
I came to work to a couple of surprises. First, on either com day or Tuesday, I was named employee of the month. I was awarded $100.00 worth of Visa gift cards, which is a blessing. Of course, since it's a form of income, I will be taxed for it. They'll just take it out of my check this pay period.
Secondly, we're having a barbecue lunch because we've had thirty straight days without any major injuries. It would be even better if I felt like eating. I'm hungry but I don't feel much like having anything.
This whole day seems off. It seems less busy (which it actually is, apparently), people seen like they're treating me differently since I've won employee of the month, and I've walking around in a kind of fog. Maybe I've just been away for too long, even if it just two days and a regular weekend.
Okay, now I'm starting to get my appetite back. I just hope that things don't "linger".
I came to work to a couple of surprises. First, on either com day or Tuesday, I was named employee of the month. I was awarded $100.00 worth of Visa gift cards, which is a blessing. Of course, since it's a form of income, I will be taxed for it. They'll just take it out of my check this pay period.
Secondly, we're having a barbecue lunch because we've had thirty straight days without any major injuries. It would be even better if I felt like eating. I'm hungry but I don't feel much like having anything.
This whole day seems off. It seems less busy (which it actually is, apparently), people seen like they're treating me differently since I've won employee of the month, and I've walking around in a kind of fog. Maybe I've just been away for too long, even if it just two days and a regular weekend.
Okay, now I'm starting to get my appetite back. I just hope that things don't "linger".
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Day one-hundred-five
Didn't go to work again today. I'm planning to go back tomorrow.
I got my insurance card yesterday, so I finally got to to see a doctor. It doesn't seem like I have anything serious. I left with a handful of packets of MiraLax, so you can draw your own conclusions. Turns out the weird dizzy spell was a consequence of the hot shower. I forget the term the doctor used, but he summed it up as a cardiovascular reflex.
I nearly walked out of the doctor's office without a note, which I promised my boss I would get since I told him I was going to the doctor. Anyone who remembers back to mid-February knows that I was out for two days on my second work of work. Back then, I was out for two days then, and I didn't have a doctor's note. I was honestly blessed that my boss didn't care and was just glad that I came back since a bunch of others had called out.
Pray that this MiraLax works. I don't remember if the doctor said to use half the packet or the whole packet. The instructions say to use the whole packet in four to eight ounces of liquid. Well, something's bound to happen.
When I go back to work tomorrow, I think I'm beginning training for my new position. I was supposed to begin today. In fact, as I write this (10:39 pm), I would've already left and be on my way home normally. By the time I go in tomorrow, I will have not been to work in five days. I know I've been away for too long because I'm just starting to get used to not being there. Not good.
I got my insurance card yesterday, so I finally got to to see a doctor. It doesn't seem like I have anything serious. I left with a handful of packets of MiraLax, so you can draw your own conclusions. Turns out the weird dizzy spell was a consequence of the hot shower. I forget the term the doctor used, but he summed it up as a cardiovascular reflex.
I nearly walked out of the doctor's office without a note, which I promised my boss I would get since I told him I was going to the doctor. Anyone who remembers back to mid-February knows that I was out for two days on my second work of work. Back then, I was out for two days then, and I didn't have a doctor's note. I was honestly blessed that my boss didn't care and was just glad that I came back since a bunch of others had called out.
Pray that this MiraLax works. I don't remember if the doctor said to use half the packet or the whole packet. The instructions say to use the whole packet in four to eight ounces of liquid. Well, something's bound to happen.
When I go back to work tomorrow, I think I'm beginning training for my new position. I was supposed to begin today. In fact, as I write this (10:39 pm), I would've already left and be on my way home normally. By the time I go in tomorrow, I will have not been to work in five days. I know I've been away for too long because I'm just starting to get used to not being there. Not good.
Monday, April 14, 2014
Day one-hundred-four
It's 12:45 pm as I write this. I called out of work today. I just don't feel well. When I was in the shower this morning, I got dizzy and felt numbness in my arms and legs. I'm convinced it had something to do with the stomach problems I've been having. I'm feeling a little better right now. Hopefully, I'll be ready for work tomorrow.
I think God has been trying to make something clear to me. While I was in the shower, I was just thinking about what had been going on with me. I just prayed for relief, and it made me realize that I needed to lean on The Lord in all circumstances, and with all that's been going on, I had been resisting His loving care. I need to be constantly reminded of God's mercy to me. I need to be reminded of how good He is to me, and to all of us.
God wants to be ours, so that He can be our Lord. He chose to have us so that we can have Him. In a world filled with a seemingly infinite number of distractions, we need to be reminded of His goodness to us. I am thankful for His love and forgiveness, and I am grateful.
I think God has been trying to make something clear to me. While I was in the shower, I was just thinking about what had been going on with me. I just prayed for relief, and it made me realize that I needed to lean on The Lord in all circumstances, and with all that's been going on, I had been resisting His loving care. I need to be constantly reminded of God's mercy to me. I need to be reminded of how good He is to me, and to all of us.
God wants to be ours, so that He can be our Lord. He chose to have us so that we can have Him. In a world filled with a seemingly infinite number of distractions, we need to be reminded of His goodness to us. I am thankful for His love and forgiveness, and I am grateful.
Sunday, April 13, 2014
Day one-hundred-three
Today seems like a good day for more Random Thoughts:
-First off, we broke 2000 pageviews last night. Thank you for continuing to hang with this blog, especially through long stretches where it was about nothing but work, work, work. There's more to come in the coming week, as I begin training in my new position this week.
-I made it back to church today for the first time in three weeks. We've continued going the book of Ephesians, particularly chapter six, in the section on the armor of God. I heard some things I desperately needed to hear. When I don't go to church, whatever the reason, I feel like I suffer spiritually. I need that instruction and fellowship, and the chance to truly get away from the things of the world for a while.
-Pray that I would get better physically. I've been battling a stomach ailment for about a week and a half. A few days ago, it seemed like I was getting better, but it seems like things have taken a turn and I'm not doing very well. Pray that I would at least be well enough for work tomorrow and the week ahead.
-First off, we broke 2000 pageviews last night. Thank you for continuing to hang with this blog, especially through long stretches where it was about nothing but work, work, work. There's more to come in the coming week, as I begin training in my new position this week.
-I made it back to church today for the first time in three weeks. We've continued going the book of Ephesians, particularly chapter six, in the section on the armor of God. I heard some things I desperately needed to hear. When I don't go to church, whatever the reason, I feel like I suffer spiritually. I need that instruction and fellowship, and the chance to truly get away from the things of the world for a while.
-Pray that I would get better physically. I've been battling a stomach ailment for about a week and a half. A few days ago, it seemed like I was getting better, but it seems like things have taken a turn and I'm not doing very well. Pray that I would at least be well enough for work tomorrow and the week ahead.
Saturday, April 12, 2014
Day one-hundred-two
Gonna be a short one tonight. I'm typing this through a headache that I hope doesn't get any worse.
Out of the blue, I was invited to a barbecue for this evening. I decided not to go, in part because of stomach issues I've had for over a week. I didn't really feel like going anyplace.
Hopefully, I'll be back to church tomorrow. I've missed the past couple of weeks, and I really want and need to get back. I always feel like I miss so much when I don't go, whatever the reason. That tends to happen when you rely on others for rides, and they don't go. I pray that I would sleep well tonight; I don't typically sleep well on Saturday nights.
On another topic, it looks like I'll begin my new position assisting the shipping manager thus next week, possibly on Tuesday. Management gave their approval; if they hadn't, the company would've made an outside hire. Also, they're going to shuffle a few people around since I'm moving out of digital and they need someone to take my place there.
Pray that God would grant me wisdom and patience in learning what I need to know, and there is a lot to learn. My manager says that I'm looking at a timetable of a couple of months to train. At least, there is the blessing of getting to the point in the year where work is going to slow down considerably as we move through spring into summer.
Out of the blue, I was invited to a barbecue for this evening. I decided not to go, in part because of stomach issues I've had for over a week. I didn't really feel like going anyplace.
Hopefully, I'll be back to church tomorrow. I've missed the past couple of weeks, and I really want and need to get back. I always feel like I miss so much when I don't go, whatever the reason. That tends to happen when you rely on others for rides, and they don't go. I pray that I would sleep well tonight; I don't typically sleep well on Saturday nights.
On another topic, it looks like I'll begin my new position assisting the shipping manager thus next week, possibly on Tuesday. Management gave their approval; if they hadn't, the company would've made an outside hire. Also, they're going to shuffle a few people around since I'm moving out of digital and they need someone to take my place there.
Pray that God would grant me wisdom and patience in learning what I need to know, and there is a lot to learn. My manager says that I'm looking at a timetable of a couple of months to train. At least, there is the blessing of getting to the point in the year where work is going to slow down considerably as we move through spring into summer.
Friday, April 11, 2014
Day one-hundred-one
Sometimes in the next couple of days, we will break 2000 pageviews since the blog began on January 1. Thank you to those who've hung in since then, and to those who've found it afterward.
I spoke to my manager a little while ago (I'm at lunch right now), and it looks like I'll be moving into my new position on Tuesday. He has already spoken to corporate and they made their approval, and he has someone in mind to take my place in the digital room.
As it turns out, Ana, our shipper, is moving to first shift, so there are two of us who need to be replaced in the digital room. Plus, Jeremiah, who makes our roll labels, has applied to be the new 2nd shift shipping lead. I don't know I if he got it, but he seems pretty confident that he will if he hasn't yet.
With all the changes going on, I badly need your prayers. Pray that God would grant me wisdom and patience in my new circumstances, that I would be patient and attentive in learning what I need to know, and that I would trust Him in all things.
Other than that, things are quiet. No overtime tonight, thankfully. My back hurts; I think I did it when I hit a bump while riding earlier and bent the seat post on my bike. First time, too.
I spoke to my manager a little while ago (I'm at lunch right now), and it looks like I'll be moving into my new position on Tuesday. He has already spoken to corporate and they made their approval, and he has someone in mind to take my place in the digital room.
As it turns out, Ana, our shipper, is moving to first shift, so there are two of us who need to be replaced in the digital room. Plus, Jeremiah, who makes our roll labels, has applied to be the new 2nd shift shipping lead. I don't know I if he got it, but he seems pretty confident that he will if he hasn't yet.
With all the changes going on, I badly need your prayers. Pray that God would grant me wisdom and patience in my new circumstances, that I would be patient and attentive in learning what I need to know, and that I would trust Him in all things.
Other than that, things are quiet. No overtime tonight, thankfully. My back hurts; I think I did it when I hit a bump while riding earlier and bent the seat post on my bike. First time, too.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
Day one-hundred
I've spent most of the last day thinking about whether I should take the new position or not. I've prayed about it, asked people to pray about it, and I still have others I want to ask about it.
In thinking about all the factors involved (which has put me in a bad mood most of the day), I've come to an important realization: I'm willing to take on a position of responsibility, but I'm not sure if I want to do that here, where I work now. In fact, I'm pretty sure I don't want to do that, because I honestly don't like where I work. Even the prospect of a raise is not enough of an incentive to make me want to take it.
It's begun motivating to consider what I really want to do, and what I'm willing to do. Right now, I'm willing to do a job I don't like and don't find rewarding, if only because I don't want to do a bad job with the one I have now. I want to do something I really enjoy, something that I find rewarding. Of course, we are called to glorify God in all that we do, but I'll admit it's something I really have to pray that I would do.
The more I think about it, the more I think the only reason I have for refusing the new position is simply that I don't want to do it. It's definitely a more stressful job by my manager's admission.,the job I have now already has its stresses without the addition of having to deal with managers and delivery people and handling freight, all of which I would be doing if I took the job.
Anyway, I have to make a choice soon. Pray that God would grant me the wisdom to make the right choice.
…
Update: Things have chaned since I added today's post.
My boss took me aside to discuss some work-related issues withe, and happened to ask if I had any time to think about my decision. I told him I wasn't sure. He said he understood and that it was something I should be sure about. He also said that if I changed my mind in the next few days, to come and see him.
The thing is, getting it all out in the open made me realize that I was resisting the right choice. Deep down, I knew I should say "yes", but I was fighting it. I kept trying to justify it to myself, that I wasn't ready, that I was unhappy.
Now that the truth is out, I feel a lot better about going forward, especially since I stopped fighting it.
In thinking about all the factors involved (which has put me in a bad mood most of the day), I've come to an important realization: I'm willing to take on a position of responsibility, but I'm not sure if I want to do that here, where I work now. In fact, I'm pretty sure I don't want to do that, because I honestly don't like where I work. Even the prospect of a raise is not enough of an incentive to make me want to take it.
It's begun motivating to consider what I really want to do, and what I'm willing to do. Right now, I'm willing to do a job I don't like and don't find rewarding, if only because I don't want to do a bad job with the one I have now. I want to do something I really enjoy, something that I find rewarding. Of course, we are called to glorify God in all that we do, but I'll admit it's something I really have to pray that I would do.
The more I think about it, the more I think the only reason I have for refusing the new position is simply that I don't want to do it. It's definitely a more stressful job by my manager's admission.,the job I have now already has its stresses without the addition of having to deal with managers and delivery people and handling freight, all of which I would be doing if I took the job.
Anyway, I have to make a choice soon. Pray that God would grant me the wisdom to make the right choice.
…
Update: Things have chaned since I added today's post.
My boss took me aside to discuss some work-related issues withe, and happened to ask if I had any time to think about my decision. I told him I wasn't sure. He said he understood and that it was something I should be sure about. He also said that if I changed my mind in the next few days, to come and see him.
The thing is, getting it all out in the open made me realize that I was resisting the right choice. Deep down, I knew I should say "yes", but I was fighting it. I kept trying to justify it to myself, that I wasn't ready, that I was unhappy.
Now that the truth is out, I feel a lot better about going forward, especially since I stopped fighting it.
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
Day ninety-nine
Continuing on yesterday's topic of not writing about work, I've decided to institute a temporary moratorium on writing about anything work-related. It's such an easy and obvious topic about which to write that I've come to use it as a bit of an excuse not to come up with something else. Lately, it seems like something really out of the ordinary had to happen for me to write about anything but work.
A second reason: I never wanted this blog to be boring to read. I had said early on (or at least, I think I've said) that I didn't want to write anything I wouldn't want to read. So much of this blog's content has had a uniform sameness in continually talking about my work, which isn't very interesting, to be honest.
I'm not going to sit here and say that everything I write from now on will be great. A lot of what I've written already isn't that great when I look at it. There's no editor but me, and I try to catch and fix spelling errors, or rework sentences that don't make sense grammatically. In fact, that last sentence was partially rewritten just because it didn't make sense on reading it.
…
Update: Everything up to this point was written during lunch, from 6:00 to 6:30 pm. Well, things have changed in the last two hours. Now, I'm going to have to break my promise not to write about work. God's timing, I suppose.
After lunch ended, my manager took me aside and told me that he wanted me to consider moving into a new position. I would be helping to ship, process received items like bindery items, handling freight shipping, and deal with the managers. In essence, I would be dealing what my manager does, and I would be assisting him, since he pretty much does it himself. Since it's presently all on his shoulders, he works twelves hours a day at least. He admits that I would be moving into a stressful position if I take the offer. It sounds like I would be making more money, but I'll have to talk to management about it.
My boss is giving me a few days to think it over, but the truth is that I don't really want the job. I don't like the job I already have, and it's already stressful enough. If I've already had a day where I faced the enormous temptation to walk out and not come back, I don't want to know what the new job is going to be like.
I honestly don't know what I'm going to do. I've had a little time to think about it, and I've already got some people praying for me. Pray that God will give me some wisdom about the choice I need to make. I can think of reasons to take the job and I can think of reasons not to take it.
A second reason: I never wanted this blog to be boring to read. I had said early on (or at least, I think I've said) that I didn't want to write anything I wouldn't want to read. So much of this blog's content has had a uniform sameness in continually talking about my work, which isn't very interesting, to be honest.
I'm not going to sit here and say that everything I write from now on will be great. A lot of what I've written already isn't that great when I look at it. There's no editor but me, and I try to catch and fix spelling errors, or rework sentences that don't make sense grammatically. In fact, that last sentence was partially rewritten just because it didn't make sense on reading it.
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Update: Everything up to this point was written during lunch, from 6:00 to 6:30 pm. Well, things have changed in the last two hours. Now, I'm going to have to break my promise not to write about work. God's timing, I suppose.
After lunch ended, my manager took me aside and told me that he wanted me to consider moving into a new position. I would be helping to ship, process received items like bindery items, handling freight shipping, and deal with the managers. In essence, I would be dealing what my manager does, and I would be assisting him, since he pretty much does it himself. Since it's presently all on his shoulders, he works twelves hours a day at least. He admits that I would be moving into a stressful position if I take the offer. It sounds like I would be making more money, but I'll have to talk to management about it.
My boss is giving me a few days to think it over, but the truth is that I don't really want the job. I don't like the job I already have, and it's already stressful enough. If I've already had a day where I faced the enormous temptation to walk out and not come back, I don't want to know what the new job is going to be like.
I honestly don't know what I'm going to do. I've had a little time to think about it, and I've already got some people praying for me. Pray that God will give me some wisdom about the choice I need to make. I can think of reasons to take the job and I can think of reasons not to take it.
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Day ninety-eight
Good workday today. We managed to get ahead on our work today. Hopefully, we can keep it up this time.
Again, there's not much to write about today. It seems like the worst days provide the most fodder for this blog. I certainly never wanted this to turn into a forum to simply vent my frustrations. Speaking truthfully, I don't really like the fact that I write so much about work. It's just an easy subject.
I think it's become clear that I don't have a lot going on right now. Lately, it's just been back and forth between work and home, with church on Sundays, and even then, I missed the last couple of weeks.
I haven't been out to do much of anything that wasn't work-related in a while. As I've mentioned earlier this week, I was supposed to go to a wedding this last Saturday, and I had to bow out due to illness.
I do text my friend Eneida to see how she's doing with her pregnancy. She's the one with whom I have the most contact. It's too easy for me to let things like staying in contact with others to by the wayside. There's a few people I should seek out and see how they're doing.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting in our living room, typing this up on my iPod Touch, and Batman Forever is on in the background. I thought this movie was awesome once; now, it's just a curiosity.
Again, there's not much to write about today. It seems like the worst days provide the most fodder for this blog. I certainly never wanted this to turn into a forum to simply vent my frustrations. Speaking truthfully, I don't really like the fact that I write so much about work. It's just an easy subject.
I think it's become clear that I don't have a lot going on right now. Lately, it's just been back and forth between work and home, with church on Sundays, and even then, I missed the last couple of weeks.
I haven't been out to do much of anything that wasn't work-related in a while. As I've mentioned earlier this week, I was supposed to go to a wedding this last Saturday, and I had to bow out due to illness.
I do text my friend Eneida to see how she's doing with her pregnancy. She's the one with whom I have the most contact. It's too easy for me to let things like staying in contact with others to by the wayside. There's a few people I should seek out and see how they're doing.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting in our living room, typing this up on my iPod Touch, and Batman Forever is on in the background. I thought this movie was awesome once; now, it's just a curiosity.
Monday, April 7, 2014
Day ninety-seven
Good day today. I'm finally getting over the tail end of that mild cold/flu/whatever it was.
I was asked to work overtime tonight, but I didn't feel up to it. I'm glad that it's still optional. I keep having the strange sensation that may change at some point.
This is shaping up to be one of those posts that exists just to make sure I don't miss a day. It's getting late as it is.
…
Let's try again tomorrow.
I was asked to work overtime tonight, but I didn't feel up to it. I'm glad that it's still optional. I keep having the strange sensation that may change at some point.
This is shaping up to be one of those posts that exists just to make sure I don't miss a day. It's getting late as it is.
…
Let's try again tomorrow.
Sunday, April 6, 2014
Day ninety-six
I better do this post quickly. I'd nearly forgotten about it.
This hasn't been much of a day. Not that it's been bad day, mind you, but rather that not much happened, and I didn't really get anything done.
First off, I didn't even make it into church this morning. I always hate it when I miss, no matter what the circumstances may be. When I go, I always end up hearing something I need to hear. I need and desire the fellowship of my brothers and sisters, especially since I'm not in a Bible study at the moment. Pray that God would grant me wisdom and direction on that front. Also, pray that I would continue to grow in my walk as a Christian man. I find more of my thoughts to be occupied with the desire to find a godly woman, the one I hope and pray God means for me.
Mostly, I've spent this whole weekend getting over the last lingering effects of the cold/flu(?) that I caught last weekend. Actually, this time around wasn't too bad; the worst of it only lasted through last weekend and I was at least well enough to work.
I've spent the last couple of hours on YouTube watching videos of old commercials, in particular local commercials for Los Angeles. I saw ads for places I remember that don't exist anymore( (Carpeteria, for example), places I'd forgotten about and didn't realize were still around (anyone else remember Banner Carpets?), and others to which I have only a tangential connection. For example, I saw an ad circa 1978 for a carpet installer whose business address now points to a vacant lot in Northridge.
Looking back at that last paragraph, I don't really know why it's the carpet ads that so stick out in my mind. It could be because in my younger days when I watched and absorbed daytime TV, there were a lot of carpet commercials, just as there are now.
This hasn't been much of a day. Not that it's been bad day, mind you, but rather that not much happened, and I didn't really get anything done.
First off, I didn't even make it into church this morning. I always hate it when I miss, no matter what the circumstances may be. When I go, I always end up hearing something I need to hear. I need and desire the fellowship of my brothers and sisters, especially since I'm not in a Bible study at the moment. Pray that God would grant me wisdom and direction on that front. Also, pray that I would continue to grow in my walk as a Christian man. I find more of my thoughts to be occupied with the desire to find a godly woman, the one I hope and pray God means for me.
Mostly, I've spent this whole weekend getting over the last lingering effects of the cold/flu(?) that I caught last weekend. Actually, this time around wasn't too bad; the worst of it only lasted through last weekend and I was at least well enough to work.
I've spent the last couple of hours on YouTube watching videos of old commercials, in particular local commercials for Los Angeles. I saw ads for places I remember that don't exist anymore( (Carpeteria, for example), places I'd forgotten about and didn't realize were still around (anyone else remember Banner Carpets?), and others to which I have only a tangential connection. For example, I saw an ad circa 1978 for a carpet installer whose business address now points to a vacant lot in Northridge.
Looking back at that last paragraph, I don't really know why it's the carpet ads that so stick out in my mind. It could be because in my younger days when I watched and absorbed daytime TV, there were a lot of carpet commercials, just as there are now.
Saturday, April 5, 2014
Day ninety-five
I'm tired. It's been a long week and I'm still a little under the weather.
I was supposed to go to a wedding this morning. I didn't go after all. As I wrote yesterday, I was thinking about just going to the ceremony and forgoing the reception. In the end, I had to pass up both. I guess I wasn't supposed to attend, in the end. There's a part of me that's tempted to think the fact that I wasn't able to buy a gift (despite planning to do so) as a sign that I wasn't meant to go. I still would've gone without a gift, but it wasn't what God had planned for me today. Oh well.
Other than that, no much else is going on. Hopefully, I'll be well (or at least, well enough) for church in the morning. Every time I miss, I always end up wishing I could've gone, no matter the circumstance that led to my non-attendance. I need the fellowship that I don't really get during the week. We're called not to forsake the gathering of the brethren, and for me, it's a critical part of my growth as a believer. This is especially important for me, as someone who was once such a recluse.
I did get a pleasant surprise today, though. I received my federal tax refund today. I have an extra $143.00, which I can certainly use. I pray that I would use it wisely.
I was supposed to go to a wedding this morning. I didn't go after all. As I wrote yesterday, I was thinking about just going to the ceremony and forgoing the reception. In the end, I had to pass up both. I guess I wasn't supposed to attend, in the end. There's a part of me that's tempted to think the fact that I wasn't able to buy a gift (despite planning to do so) as a sign that I wasn't meant to go. I still would've gone without a gift, but it wasn't what God had planned for me today. Oh well.
Other than that, no much else is going on. Hopefully, I'll be well (or at least, well enough) for church in the morning. Every time I miss, I always end up wishing I could've gone, no matter the circumstance that led to my non-attendance. I need the fellowship that I don't really get during the week. We're called not to forsake the gathering of the brethren, and for me, it's a critical part of my growth as a believer. This is especially important for me, as someone who was once such a recluse.
I did get a pleasant surprise today, though. I received my federal tax refund today. I have an extra $143.00, which I can certainly use. I pray that I would use it wisely.
Friday, April 4, 2014
Day ninety-four
Pretty good day at work. We managed to get slightly ahead on next week's work.
I had to pray that God would sustains through this day. For the first time in quite a while, I slept very poorly last night. I had to wake up early to take some tea for my stomach. I woke up three times before I finally had to get up. Also, I wasn't able to buy a wedding gift for tomorrow like I wanted. He answered my prayer in the positive, and I am grateful.
Truth be told, I'm not entirely sure if I'm going to go tomorrow. I've been tired and feeling physically drained. I may just go to the ceremony at 10:00 am and perhaps skip the reception. I want to go even when I don't feel like it, physically. I did promise that I would and even registered to attend.
I'm glad it's the weekend, it's just be such a busy weekend.
I had to pray that God would sustains through this day. For the first time in quite a while, I slept very poorly last night. I had to wake up early to take some tea for my stomach. I woke up three times before I finally had to get up. Also, I wasn't able to buy a wedding gift for tomorrow like I wanted. He answered my prayer in the positive, and I am grateful.
Truth be told, I'm not entirely sure if I'm going to go tomorrow. I've been tired and feeling physically drained. I may just go to the ceremony at 10:00 am and perhaps skip the reception. I want to go even when I don't feel like it, physically. I did promise that I would and even registered to attend.
I'm glad it's the weekend, it's just be such a busy weekend.
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Day ninety-three
Gonna be a brief post tonight. Way too busy to let it run long.
Today has been one of the busiest days we've had yet. We finally got a third person to help us pack for the full day, but our work has diminished. If anything, even with the third person, we're busier than ever. I've been silently praying all day, "Lord, sustain us through this day." I'm still not sure of everything will get out on time. If we do, it will be extremely close.
As of now, our second break (it's 8:35 pm as I write this), we still haven't had the opportunity to start on tomorrow's work. The hour of overtime tonight may allow us a small head start, but not much. We'll see what happens.
Today has been one of the busiest days we've had yet. We finally got a third person to help us pack for the full day, but our work has diminished. If anything, even with the third person, we're busier than ever. I've been silently praying all day, "Lord, sustain us through this day." I'm still not sure of everything will get out on time. If we do, it will be extremely close.
As of now, our second break (it's 8:35 pm as I write this), we still haven't had the opportunity to start on tomorrow's work. The hour of overtime tonight may allow us a small head start, but not much. We'll see what happens.
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Day ninety-two
I just got home from work a little while ago, and while it wasn't a bad day, I'm glad it's over.
Today was a truly humbling experience. I've been at this job for almost eight weeks (though it seems longer) and I realize I still have so much to learn, even about the fairly simple job I have now. I also learned that you can be at a job for years and still make mistakes at something in which you're otherwise experienced.
Last Wednesday, I wrote about how I mistakenly packed two separate jobs in the same box, and it wasn't discovered until it got to the customer. Today, I did it again. This time, it was caught by Ana, our shipper, who must've caught it when weighing it. I really need to pay better attention when I work and it's easy to get distracted when there are a dozen other things to think about at the same time.
That's not to say you can be too experienced not to make mistakes at what you do. Later in the afternoon, Ana had to send out an order to be mailed rather than shipped, only for it to be discovered that an item was missing. And still later in the evening, our cutter, Guillermo, forgot about a stack of work to be cut that wound up not being sent out today, although it was technically shipped on time.
All in all, a humbling day all around.
Today was a truly humbling experience. I've been at this job for almost eight weeks (though it seems longer) and I realize I still have so much to learn, even about the fairly simple job I have now. I also learned that you can be at a job for years and still make mistakes at something in which you're otherwise experienced.
Last Wednesday, I wrote about how I mistakenly packed two separate jobs in the same box, and it wasn't discovered until it got to the customer. Today, I did it again. This time, it was caught by Ana, our shipper, who must've caught it when weighing it. I really need to pay better attention when I work and it's easy to get distracted when there are a dozen other things to think about at the same time.
That's not to say you can be too experienced not to make mistakes at what you do. Later in the afternoon, Ana had to send out an order to be mailed rather than shipped, only for it to be discovered that an item was missing. And still later in the evening, our cutter, Guillermo, forgot about a stack of work to be cut that wound up not being sent out today, although it was technically shipped on time.
All in all, a humbling day all around.
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
Day ninety-one
After yesterday's more personal post, I want to do something light today. This is especially true as I'm writing this after 11:00 pm, rather than during work hours. Yes, I've begun writing this blog while I'm at work, during breaks and lunch. I'm more inclined to do it at work since I can now access our guest wifi network.
…
After being swamped with work the past few days, we're finally getting back to a point where we're getting ahead on our work. At least, a little. As we move further through the spring and into the summer, work should slow down considerably.
…
For the second time in a month, I have a wedding to attend this Saturday. I still need to buy a gift and I want to get my suit dry cleaned. I have time to get stuff done, since I get paid this Thursday and my mornings are open. I need to look at their registry.
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As today is April Fool's Day, I thought I'd mention one of the oddest pranks I've ever heard anyone pull off. Keith Moon, late drummer for The Who, used to pull off a prank that required a degree of patience and subtlety that ran contrary to his wild persona.
A friend would go into a department store and ask to see their trousers made with the strongest material. The friend would sometimes be accompanied by an actress playing his wife to help sell the deception. Moon would come in as an anonymous customer, doing shopping of his own. He would be drawn into helping the other man test the strength of the trousers; each one would grab a leg and pull on the trousers until they tore in two. As they complained to the flummoxed salesperson about the weak material, another man would enter the scene (reputedly a one-legged actor) and say that he would pay extra money for one-legged trousers.
I think I like this one because it's not particularly mean-spirited as such pranks can be; it's just wonderfully bizarre.
…
After being swamped with work the past few days, we're finally getting back to a point where we're getting ahead on our work. At least, a little. As we move further through the spring and into the summer, work should slow down considerably.
…
For the second time in a month, I have a wedding to attend this Saturday. I still need to buy a gift and I want to get my suit dry cleaned. I have time to get stuff done, since I get paid this Thursday and my mornings are open. I need to look at their registry.
…
As today is April Fool's Day, I thought I'd mention one of the oddest pranks I've ever heard anyone pull off. Keith Moon, late drummer for The Who, used to pull off a prank that required a degree of patience and subtlety that ran contrary to his wild persona.
A friend would go into a department store and ask to see their trousers made with the strongest material. The friend would sometimes be accompanied by an actress playing his wife to help sell the deception. Moon would come in as an anonymous customer, doing shopping of his own. He would be drawn into helping the other man test the strength of the trousers; each one would grab a leg and pull on the trousers until they tore in two. As they complained to the flummoxed salesperson about the weak material, another man would enter the scene (reputedly a one-legged actor) and say that he would pay extra money for one-legged trousers.
I think I like this one because it's not particularly mean-spirited as such pranks can be; it's just wonderfully bizarre.
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