I'm on break at work as I write this (4:02 pm) and I've been hit by the midweek doldrums. It hasn't even been particularly busy today; most of what's due has already been sent out. We're just at the point where we've got to find our second wind to finish out the week.
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Lately, it seems that more and more of my thoughts are occupied with the idea of finding a girlfriend, and beyond that, I often think about finding the woman I hope God means to be my wife. I have wanted one for a very long time, but I haven't been ready for one. I'm still not sure that I am now.
I often think about her, though, whoever she may be. I wonder who she is, where she is, if I've met her, if she even knows The Lord at this point in her life or not. I wonder if she's with someone else. Is she married, single, widowed, divorced? Will The Lord lead me somewhere away from here to find her, or will He lead her here? I wonder about what she looks like. Will I know her when I see her, or will it take time for that knowledge to become clear? I even pray for her; God knows who she is, even as I do not.
On very rare occasions, and I'm not lying to you about their rarity, I wonder if she ever thinks about me.
As you've clearly noticed, these things occupy a good deal of my thoughts. It is a sobering thought, for example, to realize that by the time my parents were my age (29 as of this writing), they were already married.
Dad has told me that he thinks that with all that's been going on, he believes that I'm going through a period of preparation. I wonder if I'm being prepared for more than I realize.
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